katikat | Fic: Let's Get Drunk

Title: Let's Get Drunk
Author:

katikat
Rating: PG
Genre and/or Pairing: Peter/El, Peter/Neal, El/Neal, Peter/El/Neal implied 8P
Spoilers: None
Warnings: Drunk people ahead! And crack, utter crack!
Word Count: ~400
Summary: Elizabeth and Diana get drunk together!
Notes: A big thanks to

yami_tai for her amazing beta!

"My husband has the hots for Neal Caffrey," Elizabeth stated, throwing back another shot.

Diana stopped mid-move, her shot glass halfway to her lips. What could she say to that?

Elizabeth looked at her and giggled drunkenly. "Your face!" she laughed then waved a hand, almost overbalancing on the bar stool. "Don't worry. I've known for almost eight years now." Then a sullen look appeared on her face as she gazed deeply into her empty glass. "But until recently, Neal was a just a pretty face in Peter's files, just another criminal to be put under lock and key. Now though..." She sighed.

"He is pretty, isn't he?" Diana whispered conspiratorially, leaning closer.

Elizabeth blinked at her, frowning slightly in confusion.

"Hey, just because I don't root for the team, doesn’t mean I can’t acknowledge their assets," Diana retorted haughtily, before giving in to the urge to giggle.

Elizabeth clinked her empty glass against Diana's full one. "Amen to that, sister. We need to drink to that." She waved at the barkeeper who gestured that he would be right there.

"It's just..." Elizabeth sighed, blowing her bangs up from her forehead. "Neal's so charming and nice and... and..." She waved her hand around, almost smacking the man sitting next to her. "And they're so good for each other. Peter's having fun at work again and Neal really needs his keeper." She fell silent, then added in a mumbled voice, "And it's not like I haven't felt tempted, you know?"

"So, what will you do?" Diana asked, raising her shot glass to her lips again.

Elizabeth let her head hang and wailed, "I don't know. I can either close my eyes and pretend my husband's not smitten with his partner or..." She paused, straightening her back, her eyes glinting in the bar's low light. "Or I can start planning a threesome!"

Diana wheezed and coughed, the last of her shot going down the wrong way. When she finally got her breathing under control - with the help of a few well aimed thumps to her back that Elizabeth delivered - she looked at her friend, eyes almost popping out of her head.

Elizabeth gazed into her still empty glass mournfully, missing Diana's reaction completely. "But for such a decision, I'm not drunk enough yet." Thumping the shot glass on the bar, she yelled, "Barkeeper! One more!"

The End